Sunday, 28 June 2009

random thoughts....

There are three spiders living on my window. I can see their shadows through the curtains at night.
I have a little koala hanging from a desk lamp; I have a rose Grant doesn't know I kept.
On a night like this I wish myself in a gallery in New York, holding a glass of wine, watching photographs or paintings. But I did that here last week.
Sometimes I don't understand myself. I can be this today and that tomorrow and who cares if I fuck up, you can't -says our line of thought. Life is an experience, there's no right or wrong, just experiences.
I fucking love music. I could sit there for hours and travel in my head under the influence of a good tune. I think Bob Schneider is awesome.
I used to stargaze. God I did that my whole life. I would search for anything I could find about the stars, planets, the universe; I wanted to be an astronomist. I had glow-in-the-dark starts covering my walls and ceiling. Dance isn't boring; just difficult; but then again, is there any other way of truly flying? I have three small dogs. Dolly slept in my bed since she was a puppy; she still uses it now that I am here. I wonder if Ainslie is writing beautiful new songs.
I've never been to Scotland. I will have the fun of my life, they say.
I did something intending to do something slightly different. Why did I do that?

I've been listening to this song for the last hour. Just this one, I can't yet get to terms with how fucking good it is... maybe another listen... I just realized my friend Bruce is playing the bass in that video.. funny... Maybe if I go to Austin I will get to meet Bob. I like Bruce, although he must think I am a bad tourist guide. I fucked up, didn't I; and I just discovered I am a bad salsa dancer. Why does one do one thing if one intends to do a different one?

I need to stop thinking. I need some meditation. A little yoga. A run in the morning. A smoke.

I need some more music.

Or a sign.