Saturday 1 August 2009

On love, on a not-so-particular-night, on this computer...

Maybe men don't have women in their heads.
They have sausage rolls, food, CD's, some movies, breasts, but no women.
It rains there most of the time.
Women think of men often.
Whether they like them that much or not.
They just do- they're cute and funny and smart.
No, not the women... Well, yes-also... but I was talking about the qualities women give the men they always think about.
Men don't seem to think about women. They forget, they ignore, they like pissing them off (women, I mean).
Women think of men often.
But what is it that men always think about, then? How could I possibly know? I am not a man.
In a few hours the ciber-retro-astro urinal will rise from below the ground, people will be out drinking and I will be heading home not knowing if the world agrees with my plans of greatness. I feel a little sad tonight. A little melancholic. A little lonely. Maybe I'm just feeling hormonal. Sometimes the four walls that are supposed to make you feel safe, imprison you and dry you from energy.
Tell me... Is it the apron?
I only ask for a little effort. Show me that you care, for God's sake! But no one cares... Maybe they just ran out of mariachis...
of flowers, chocolates, ideas; I don't know.
I'm scared of relationships.
I'm scared of someone falling in love with me and of me not being able to love them back.
I'm scared of falling madly for someone and having that someone falling out of love with me; or just cheating on me with a cow, a strange exotic flower, an underwear model from California, a millionaire or just a bitch.
I've done crazy things; not kissed on a date, kissed on date, called back, not called back, said the truth, not said the truth...driven people away... Truth is I just want what everybody else...
To love and to be loved.
Isn't that what it's all about?
So tell me what the bloody problem is.... is it the apron?